Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Jaja catch up

Morning, please be patient with me as there are so many half thoughts and ideas sauntering through my mind.  And it is a time to celebrate a truly magnificent change in the family tree-- 

Opal Roslyn born 2 weeks early via emergency c-section! 

This sweet baby made my days have such a newness! We are so proud do her and her parents!

July 4th!

Papa instant attachment for this small bundle was reflective of when we brought our own new babies home -- relaxed and patient

And the tears when I had to catch my plane where on the edge of hysteria!
(Ok she wanted to nurse it was really me screaming on the inside "I will be so far away!"

But really we are mesmerized watching our daughter so beautifully become a mother.  Our girls have always been such beautiful smart gifted young women and to see this one almost shine with motherly love just takes our breaths away.

-------------thoughts as a grandmother, the mother of the mother... 
It was hard and amazingly scary to hear that your grand baby's life was in danger from placenta abruption -- but of course my heart broke for our daughter while in great fear she had to accept the council of her doctor for the emergency c-section. And watch her cry as she discussed it with her wonderful calm husband and doctor, she was handed forms to sign (at least 100 it seemed like) I knew all the half thoughts going through her head and really you just have to do whatever they say and do it quickly.   ~as the mother of the mother I was told to get out of the way (I was trying to hold her hand) and suddenly just Dad and I were looking at each other - if he was afraid I didn't see it! He had stars in his eyes when he looked at me and said "it is really happening! We are having our baby today"  I should have hugged him but honestly I was so afraid that my fear would influence his excitement I didn't - I asked him to please keep me so updated that it would be like I was in there! 
Then as he has stated in his portion of the day - they told me to go out by the aquarium and wait for 2 hours! 
The next time I saw my own baby she was so high on motherhood that I had to join in! Even though I had been left in a scared to death state of mind! The nurse let me hold the baby and omg! She was beautiful and I was so so happy but I wanted to hug my baby! She had scared me to death! I remember touching her head, and running my fingers on her cheeks while she held her own baby and thinking, "you will always be my baby" - just like my own mother had said to me even on my 40th birthday - "I love you and soon you will know this love as well!"  This "birth day brought my own moms words and sentiments all back to life and I apologized to her again for not being aware of how hard my own childbirth experiences were on her! 

I spent the day with the new family in their room and my son in law is so fabulous in his care for my daughter that I really had nothing to do but watch and smile. He thought of things before she did! And when I left at 8:00 pm I couldn't wait to get home pour a wine call my big sister and just cry every single tear that I had held in all day long!  

What a day Opal! Welcome to the family! Welcome to the world! And Morgan and Andrew welcome to parenthood!


  1. Oh mom thank you for writing this! I loved reliving the day from your eyes. scary and chaotic as it was.

    ........when you walked out of our apartment to go to the airport I started crying and Opal, who had been crying, suddenly nuzzled into my chest and just stared up at me. it was sweet. And I told her, "One day, Opal, you will know it is always just so hard to say bye to your mom" and then I realized...that's ME. I'm your mom. and one day I'll come help YOU take care of YOUR babies, and I will have to leave. It made me cry more but the continuity of the daughter-mother roles is sort of amazing. It is all very cyclical and overlapping..and amazing. Like watching your baby become a mother and remembering your mom watch her baby become a mother...

  2. The sisterhood in mothering is phenomenal -- the closeness of mother daughter relationships is mystical (I mean you can reflect on how your great grandmother must've felt when her daughters first child was still born! How frightened and protective my Nanny must've felt towards my mother!) it is is timeless!